Print this page

The struggles of an abandoned mother

21 January 2018
Nancy Metuo

MOTHERHOOD is one of the most beautiful experiences that a woman can have in her entire life.

Equally, it can also be one of the most stressful responsibilities a woman can ever find herself in.

 After all, there are so many different things and responsibilities that women have to take care of.

They nurture, protect, feed, clothe, and provide the loving care we need to grow and develop into responsible human beings.

Mothers play a crucial role in moulding who we are.

However, nothing is so heart-drenching than to mother a young family after a few years of marriage. 

In which case, the mother is inevitably compelled to take on her partner’s responsibilities whilst performing hers simultaneously. 

However, when love erodes from the home, the heart is most certainly susceptible to extra marital affairs.

When this happens, the situation can be unfathomable, unbearable and sometimes stressful and even suicidal.

The home can be flamboyant, lively and profusely abundant with both emotional and physical provisions when parents are genuinely bonded in love.

In Nancy Metuo’s case, whose husband left her for another woman in December of 2011, struggle, sweat, and tears are the name of the game.

With immediate brothers committed to their own families, Ms Metuo has no one to turn to but to quickly adjust to the changing circumstance in order to keep her young family going.  

Ms Metuo was left with two children, a boy and a girl to care for alone.

If that is not enough, the lack of a formal employment further exacerbates her family’s situation, pushing her to the limits never experienced before.

“Caring and providing for two young children alone is not for the faint hearted,” she recounts amidst slow flowing tears of solace that only young abandoned mothers like her could ever feel.  

Ms Metuo further reiterates that she sometimes retreats to the confine of her tiny one bedroom shack to shed a few tears when the world’s impossibilities are the options left for her.

She often laments why the world is so kind to some and a living hell to others.

“Financial obligations such as school fees, clothing and food are pressing commitments that I wake up to everyday and finding ways to address them is my daily hurdle,” Ms Metuo says,  whilst momentarily looking away to hide her tears.

“Sometimes I couldn’t go to sleep but remain awake in bed pondering what to do the next day to help mitigate my financial situation,” she adds.    

She says that a combination of unemployment and a family to provide and care for in an urban setting is bound to run into occasional head winds.

“These two don’t go together,” she says, “and a combination is simply a perfect recipe for disaster, daily stress and tears.”

She iterates that she often appears brave and confident on the outside but behind her self-assured impersonation lays the truth deep within. 

However, after what to her a long time, Ms Metuo secured employment with a Security firm that somehow helped her through.

“My husband left us when my daughter was in sixth form at Waimapuru Secondary School in Makira whilst my son was in standard six,” she says.

“You could only imagine the sleepless nights I went through to keep my children at school,” and emotional Ms Metuo says, wiping the tears from her eyes.

“Talking about it now brings back memories of the happy years we have had before and that have for so long remained dormant in my heart.

“However, I am beginning to breathe a sigh of relief seeing my daughter is scheduled for graduation in Nursing at the end of this year,” she says with a wide smile that can’t be mistaken for something else but absolute elation. 

“I’ve passed the most trying times of my life and I’m satisfied with the efforts I’ve put into it.”

Ms Metuo says that as soon as her daughter enters employment, a good portion of the burden she carries all these years will evaporate into thin air.

“At least she will be able to augment my salary to meet family needs as well as her brother’s school fees,” Ms Metuo articulates with total satisfaction.





Latest from Editor